Personal Story: Letter to my 16-year-old Self

Dear pregnant 16-year-old Divine Justice, 

You missed your period, your breasts are tender, and you’ve been slowly gaining weight. It's been a couple of months now and about 10 pregnancy tests later. I know you may not want to believe this, but you are most certainly pregnant!  

Your first instinct will be to hide in fear. Fear from your parents, peers, society, the future, and your unborn child. Though your journey ahead will be scary, traumatizing, and life changing; I really wish you didn’t hide. You waited so long to tell your parents and because of this your child missed out on prenatal care, and you missed out on the true beauty of pregnancy. Instead of hiding from your truths, try embracing them. Remember that everyone's story will differ and everyone is on a different timeline in life. It's going to take you some time to adjust but please trust yourself and never forget who you are as well as who you want to be.  

You’re a mom now and every decision you make moving forward will affect your baby girl. No, you were not ready to be a mom, but your daughter didn’t ask to be born. Though many view you as a baby yourself, it's time to grow up now and take some responsibility. Most of the time you'll be figuring things out on your own and making sacrifices other parents didn’t have to make. But it's okay and you will soon be okay too!  

It's going to get real lonely, take that time to learn more about yourself. You're going to end up dropping out of high school, losing all your friends, leaving your child's father, raising your daughter in a broken home, and experiencing both depression and anxiety. But I promise you after every storm of misery, there will always be a rainbow of peace and joy on the other side.  

You will still graduate high school on time with both honors and your esthetician license, graduate college with a degree in psychology and business, land your dream job, start a clothing business, and change the world for many! And guess who was by your side every single step of the way? Your baby girl, Dynasty Dream. Unfortunately, you guys will have to grow up and learn things together, but you'll also have a little partner to do life with!  

Parenting her will be challenging, I mean--she is a little version of you, of course. Continue to be patient with her and teach her how important it is to love herself. Yeah, your storyline is a little all over the place and you’ve made your fair share of mistakes, but you have all the power, Divine Justice!  

Focus on the present, take on one day at a time, and keep your future in mind. Though the past is important and a part of you, it doesn’t define who you are or tell where you are going. Only you can do that! Don't be so hard on yourself and never give up; you are capable of all things! You are truly my inspiration and superhero! If only you believed in yourself sooner...

Author: Divine Justice Hilliard, YUP! Member and young parent of one child